Failure #2

21 Jul

Or, maybe instead of failures, I should call them experiments with unplanned results. Regardless, it didn’t go the way I wanted it to yesterday.

So, as anyone with a drain knows, they clog sometimes. Especially when the other person who uses the showers clips his toenails and fingernails (GROSS!!!!!!!!) in the tub. So gross, bleh, disgusting. Trusty readers, you might have the urge to point the finger at me because of my flowing reddish tendrils, but, ahem, I use a plugger thingy that keeps the hair from going down the drain. So, I blame the toenails, mostly so he doesn’t do it anymore. And he promised he won’t.

At this juncture, I welcome said shower-sharer to write about something I do that grosses him out in the comments, as I undoubtedly do. And don’t want him to feel picked on. Because he knows where I sleep at night.

So, back to the clog. I was thinking, as I was formulating my plan to de-clog the clog, how a person will die, DIE, if they ingest the fabulously fast-working concoctions like Drano. And then, I started thinking about where the toxins go to after they fix the clog in the drain. My best guess? The Mississippi River, which flows less than a mile away from our lovely abode. And then I thought about the fish, and the ducks, and the people that still swim in that river. And then I started picturing all the sad animals that have been victims of the oil spill in the Gulf. And I decided to do what my mother used to always do when we had a clogged drain at home growing up.

I got out my baking soda and vinegar—you know, that stuff you use to make cookies and salad dressing—and made a volcano of fizzing goodness in the tub. If it fizzes, it’s working. Right? Afterwards, I started up my kettle and poured bowling water down the drain. I saw some brown disgusting goodness come up, and I thought, YES! I’m doing good things! So, just for the hell of it, I did it again. And even more brown crap came up! SWEET!

I figured the drain would be tested later that night by shower-sharer when he got home from the gym. And I was right…but…I think I made the clog even worse instead of fixing it. My best guess is that I just moved it farther down the pipes. It was a sad evening for me. So I ate a Chipotle burrito.

This post serves several reasons. 1. It’s a project, and this blog was formulated to detail my projects, successful or not. And 2. It’s descriptive of how I try to live my life. Which is to have the least negative effect possible on our dear little planet’s environment as I can. I know people point to cow farts as the real reason the ozone layer is getting thinner and holey (but it’s coming back! We’re saved!!), but, you know what? In my opinion, that’s a load of cow excrement.

It’s easier to live your life not caring so much about the environment, by using Drano whenever you have a clogged drain, or just throwing everything in the trash instead of sorting the recyclables. I get pretty mad at people sometimes who act as though the Earth revolves around them (the SUN, it revolves around the SUN, dammit!!) and do things like throw their cigarettes out the window of their cars and print every email they get at work. And little things like that add up. I’m trying to deduct them instead.


It did work! I guess it took a couple showers to break that clog up, but when I took a shower this morning, miraculously, there was no slowness, no back-up, nothing! Huzzah! However, I’m still taking Terri’s advice and getting that thing at Target.


4 Responses to “Failure #2”

  1. katey lee July 21, 2010 at 8:49 pm #

    This is hilarious.

    I did this SAME exact thing this year at our house. The baking soda and vinegar definitely made our clog worse. What I ended up doing is a getting this plastic stick with spikes on the side and literally dug out the hair clog with the stick. I want to find a reusable one b/c the plastic spikes ended up bending and breaking so I couldn’t use it again. I think investing in a “snake” is the next best thing.

    The baking soda and vinegar work great for cleaning the stove and sink though. I clean everything with vinegar now – makes for an unusual smell in the house but it works great and hey its good for the earth!

    My latest development in using all natural products is home-made laundry detergent. LOVE it!

    You should check out our blog we half-heartedly started last year. We plan to start updating after the wedding (when our garden is producing squash, tomatoes and peppers left and right) and when we get chickens in August – those should be some interesting posts.

    Way to support the all natural and organic life style!

    • jsophia July 21, 2010 at 9:11 pm #

      I actually kind of like the smell of vinegar! And at least it doesn’t linger. I will definitely check out your blog, too!

  2. Terri July 21, 2010 at 9:31 pm #

    I have unclogged sinks and tubs in our house on multiple occassions. The culprit is in the shower is always a disgusting coagulated mixture of hair (even though I have a hair catcher mabob too), hair products that have slime-ified in the hair, mildew and soap. I bought this “seen on TV” thing from Target that is basically a covered wire with a piece of the picky side of velcro on the end. You shove it down the drain and bring up the icky goo that resembles a particularly disgusting cat hairball. Gross, I know, but it’s the only thing I can compare it to. Beware, it WILL make you gag. If the sight of it doesn’t get you, the smell will.

  3. Azure July 22, 2010 at 2:46 pm #

    Jenna we have a “snake” if you want to borrow it. However what comes out of that drain will give you nightmares.

    PS- We also have some 3M mask thingees

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